Advice from A Lexis

I don’t like that I keep procrastinating

but I don’t know how to improve the situation


Dear Lexis,

I am having a problem with motivation. I know that I should focus and get to work but every time I start I find myself feeling depressed, sad, or entirely without motivation. I don’t like that I keep procrastinating, but I don’t know how to improve the situation. Can you help?


Dear Unmotivated,

I understand where you’re coming from. There are many tasks in our lives that we don’t necessarily want to do but feel are important; there are also tasks that we want to do, but still can’t seem to find the motivation for. It’s a strange parallel.

But, whichever circumstance you find yourself in, the solution tends to be the same. Reframing.

Teal Swan made a video on the subject of gaining/developing motivation through a search for the “self serving motive” and I’ve found the information to be very helpful in regard to figuring this stuff out. (

Teal suggests that we look deeper, find an intrinsic reason as to why we do something. If you don’t like doing the dishes, but value meditation and being present, you can look at the task as  a meditation. If you’re an artist and hate cooking, you can reframe the task into an art project where the individual ingredients are your materials.

Take dishes as an example, if you do the dishes because you feel like they have to be done, you’re generally trying to force yourself to do something you really don’t want to do. In the long run, this behavior leads to a decrease in dish doing (as you can’t find the motivation) or resentment (as you feel that you shouldn’t have to do this task). Whereas, if you are someone who desires order in the house and you see doing the dishes as an opportunity to improve your feeling of comfort, you may find that you wind up enjoying the task.

But how do you go about reframing?

  1. Recognize that the task doesn’t need to be done right now

The first, and most challenging thing you need to do is recognize that the task can wait. Even if you only give yourself five minutes, you can still wait to start until that five minutes is over. However, I would argue that any given task can wait even longer if necessary.

By recognizing that you don’t have to do the task right now, you can let yourself breathe and refocus your mind in a positive direction.

  1. Ask yourself what value you find in the completion of the task

Start applying a more positive spin. Listen to yourself and really try to figure out what value you find in this task. Perhaps you work because you like the idea of abundance and security. Perhaps you clean because you like order and the knowledge that your house is sanitary.

Whatever benefit your receive from the “doing” of the task will work, not necissarily the completion. You need to find the reason why you, specifically, want to do this task.

Ask yourself how you can get yourself to want to do this task and the answer will come if you give it enough time.

  1. Set the intention and only do the task when you aren’t upset by it

Once you have your benefit or reason for wanting to do the task, set the intention to receive it before work. (I intend to feel or receive ______ .)

DO NOT start the task if you’re feeling upset or stressed. If you feel stressed or upset, you haven’t completed the first two steps yet. Go back to the beginning and start again. It’s worth it.

Once you’re feeling good, relaxed, and ready to begin, get to work.

People underestimate the value of taking a few minutes to get your head screwed on straight. We tend to try to force ourselves to push through when we really should just take a step back.

There’s a reason you aren’t taking action. You won’t be as productive from a negative space. Your body is telling you to reassess the situation. Listen to it and figure out the best step forward.

Good luck with your tasks,

     ~ Lexis

Alexis Baker writes from her home in Olympia.  Write to her at 


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