When sticking to a project and process

Alexis Rae Baker

Dear Lexis,

How do you know when you should quit a project vs when to stick it out?

Thanks,

Wondering in Lacey

Dear Wondering,
That is a tricky one, but generally speaking, I would recommend that you stick things out. The reason for this is that what you're pursuing is likely something that you want to achieve.

It's a question that I've asked myself on many occasions, and like you, I wasn't sure when it was appropriate to stick with it or give up. So, rather than looking for some magic moment when the answer would come to me, I came up with another evaluation system.

If I really want something, is it ever appropriate to stop trying to achieve it?

If something really matters to you, wouldn't you regret not doing everything in your power to get it? That's certainly the conclusion that I've come to. Starting a business, for example, is something that I've wanted to do since I was a little girl (I know, an odd dream for a little girl). I've pursued that dream on and off for years, debating if I should give up on the whole endeavor.

But, when it comes down to it, I see business as the avenue of change within our world, and I would like to make a real difference in the lives of the people around me. So, despite the challenges, I've continued to return to the concept of creating a business.

There's another aspect to this quitting notion, though, which is systems and methods. Perhaps you've already committed to an overarching goal and now you're wondering when you should stop utilizing a particular method in regard to that goal.

Utilizing the business example, you can approach marketing in two main ways: paid and organic. Paid marketing has a pretty hard cut-off point (aka when you run out of money, you stop advertising), but organic outreach is a bit grayer. Should you use Instagram, blogs, Facebook, TikTok, or any other platforms? Should you use them all simultaneously or one at a time?

With the plethora of choices, it can be difficult to know if you're doing the right thing, and even if you've made a decision, it's hard to know when you should cut your losses and try a new platform.

What I've been learning though, is that it's actually less likely that you're messing something up than it is that you just haven't tried for a long enough period of time.

Consider a river, it flows across the stone day in a day out, never once questioning whether it will eventually wear down the stone around it. The river only flows in one direction, and while its path may divide further down, it always begins in one location.

What you do is less important than that you keep doing it.

Eventually, you will learn the ins and outs, and while you may find it helpful along the way, it's far better to stick to one path than to dilute your efforts through division early on.

It's difficult, I know, to trust a process, particularly if you aren't seeing results, but switching methods will often destroy any progress you've made thus far.

So, similar to the overarching goal, I would say that it's better to stick it out and see where you go than it is to quit.

Ultimately, it's your decision, and I won't judge your choice either way. I've certainly quit on many occasions myself. However, I can say that looking back, if I'd just stood my ground, I probably would have created the future I'm still longing for already. Be mindful. If it's worth doing, it's worth pushing past the struggle of today. It's always better to live life without regret.

Hope this helps,

~ Lexis Rae

Lexis is Alexis Rae Baker. She writes from her home in Olympia.  Got a question about life, relationships, spirit? Visit her at lexisrae.com or write to Lexis at  Lexis@theJOLTnews.com 

EDITOR'S NOTE: The opinions expressed above are those of Alexis Rae Baker and not necessarily of The JOLT or its staff or board of directors. Alexis Rae Baker is not a licensed psychologist or specialist healthcare professional. Her advice does not replace the care of psychologists or other healthcare professionals.